2011/04/03＊Takuro

「We’re in Osaka」

9mm has already arrived in Osaka in advance for our live tomorrow. Just moments before the show, the co-billing secret band alone will arrive to the venue by helicopter. I’ll let you guys in on the secret: that’s really just decoy. 9mm will be posing as part-time workers inside the venue. We’ll pretend to work as such and be on standby while acting as security in front of the stage. When our intro music comes on, we’ll all simultaneously get rid of our disguises (by way of magically changing our clothes really fast) as we make our way on stage as our real selves! At that moment, we’ll be seized by this extraordinarily muscular security guard we’ll have prepared (a giant the size of a sumo wrestler) and be thrown out the venue. Yeah, this kind of story that you’d never think of as being anything but the absolute truth, it’s just the kind of lie I wanted to make… but before I’d noticed, April Fools Day had already ended. Ah well.

But really, our excellent staff has taken great measures to maintain the secrecy concerning the other band. However, if by any chance you do find out who they are, let’s keep it between you and 9mm. Please keep the secret to yourself until the show starts. However, if for some reason you do not, your whole life you won’t be able to neatly split wooden disposable chopsticks anymore, your glasses will get cloudy even if you aren’t doing anything and if you’re right-handed, you’ll only be able to write characters nicely with your left hand from now on. Terrible curses such as these await you if you do not do as told. I’m not bluffing. Hey, April Fools ended already. At any rate, I’m speaking the truth. I’m going to trust you guys.

Now then, it’s time for me to quit rambling and get some sleep. Lately, it constantly feels to me like the things essential to my daily life are changing. But, as 9mm has a performance tomorrow, I’ll have to start off with one of those essentials: making noise. Well then, I’ll see you at the show. Good night.